internal conflicts, moral, social,cultural dillemmas abound!...guess this hits people during puberty but it was delayed in my case....ill put it down one by one..

start with yesterday...tmi sad shes havin a fun time givin quizzes, particapating in debates n what not in all colleges of mumbai and that she had become wellknown due to theis in bsc......that put me off...now why? is that jealousy?...but of whom? tmi-one of "my" people? happened to read a certain line today which goes: worst kind of feeling:jealousy of others; success

now the other one...had a freshers party...was quite nice...with some dance n all...some ppl jived to but i was unable to find a partner(rather not tried...coz i dunno jive!)...but i managed to do birdy dance on stage..with help from disha mary...
but at the end of the day..it was ashton who stole the show with his mimicry of all the profs...now this put me off too...

the third ones the regular...not gettin enough female attention..

okay the jubiliations were absent...but i attribute it to the lack of action..today it was more like workbook than workshop...damn....
rugved still is icy...but everyone else feels friendly...even the girls..
the lectures are starting to fell damn boring...will have to see into it...the so called unit tests are next week...n we cant bunk so wheres the time to stuy?..but still will have to manage...dunno how

somethings unsettling me...i dont know what n i donno what..rather what exactly....letme run you through my day for u to get the idea...
went to anchitas as i had an invitation for her ganpati...salil n bob were there too....n then i gues her talks made all the difference....she talked about hookah n boozing damn freely...as if its what kids do everyday...was it the reason? did i become uncomfortable because i hadnt done anything of it ? or is it the casual manner in which she talked about hookups n dating n makin out n stuff...i havent got any ..is it "it??
or was it her friend...a rather smart-rather smoot marathi+english speaking gal? am i having inferiority complex? do i need to make myself smarter?..or is it that i think i dont look good enough? or is it all of these? wat wat wat???

do you want to know y i post every thursday n never miss it?
workshop!...once again it proved its ability to lift one n alls spirits n leave them elated...wonder ho some primitive cutting.sawing,filing.welding ,getting yourself dirty can eneble you to experience joy never before seen...
shreya expressed that she finds kevin oversmart...wonder why?
everthing else...as normal...only im findin bee to be very boring a subject

couldnt post for two days...had a reason for yesterday..was down with akmost cold like symptims...sore throat so had to sleep early...maybe the effect of the ice cream i had,on tmis insistence mind you the day before...
thoday.
sumay...mishra again...wasted time in the evenin...went to buy a new watch! again.....got the SAME one i had got earlier...but this time, from ghatkopar...,.but this one seems to have some dirt on the underside of the glass...gotta look into it....met an interesting civil engineer uncle today....went on talkin abt enginnering n all....but the unforgettable questin he asked was what games u play..instantly replied..on computer..moments later came the realisatin...it was games as in sports! do i play? no...im bad at most of em...or is it that i dont try??..but i really have to start playing something..atleast try...will stick to neville for that...
the sore throat showin some signs of respit due to use of hot water,salted hot water, am-pm mouthwash,n ya some coconut water...lets see if this concoction works..
with this i take -whoevers- leave..hopin that tomorrow super mario will call me and say"ye lo tumhare teen lakh!"

happiness!joy!ecstasy!....was workshop again..and once again came out reeling under its spell...started with welding..got it right the first time..but then the electrodes decided to stick..n i was able to weld properly again after many attempts...then was woodworking, where i immediately got the hang of the one stroke-vreak technique...taught jitin who was thankful!...bu the end i managed to cut a small piece for myself n gave the other half to THE boyfriend...when i came to know that the end was near...so just gave away the blok piece to shraddha/shreya(still dunno..who wass happ..dunno y...in all everythin was funn

i keep feeling im back at my school, more and more, everyday...today it were the lecs of praful n bee that added to this feeling.....while for praful 4 of us, me,neville,saketn vaibhav sat on the first two benches n kept sharing jokes throughout the lecture..with brief pauses of selence(that was when praful came arund)....n we shifted to the last bench for the bee..a lot of comments..a game of xno,one on chit with shraddha/shreya(still not sure of her name)..payin no/very misiscule attention to what was goin on the board i was bound to feel just like school!
btw attended the weekly mass today...second one for me...tho i sing hymns n get fathers preachings..still dont manage to say what all seeem to know by heart...some chorus sentences..
btw dis a pic on our coll grounds...first day when it was sunny n the grass wasnt slushy n we were able to step on it...includes vaibhav.noel,varun